Many thanks to those of you who were able to send me a your posts.
Some of you reading this, now that is has been linked to Don's blog, might be thinking "Hey! Nobody told me about this! I want to say something about Don on his Birthday! Dag!" In many cases, I either no longer had your email, or I was unable to pilfer it from Don's address book - as I was crossing many unspoken boundaries by going through his email.
If you are so inclined and want to add your words to the Birthday Blogosphere, please go ahead and post your messages in the comments section of Don's response (or wherever).
If there is something that requires a photo, you can email it to me and and I'll post it for you.
My email is ellison.jj@gmail.com (No trolls or Haters, please)
Thanks!
Sunday, February 3, 2008
From Don to all of you
First - thank you all for the kind words. "Don Hall is Aids" warms my heart...truly.
Second, all of you should know that I could whip your asses if we were competitors on the new American Gladiators in spite of the massive weight of my man-balls.
Third, thank you. Michael Shurtleff wrote in "Audition" that you can learn more about a character in a play by what others say of him than by any other means. If that is the case, then I'm pretty happy to be described in such interesting ways by such interesting and inspiring people. It absolutely made my day.
Second, all of you should know that I could whip your asses if we were competitors on the new American Gladiators in spite of the massive weight of my man-balls.
Third, thank you. Michael Shurtleff wrote in "Audition" that you can learn more about a character in a play by what others say of him than by any other means. If that is the case, then I'm pretty happy to be described in such interesting ways by such interesting and inspiring people. It absolutely made my day.
From Bilal Dardai
Happy Birthday, Don!
In honor of the many entertaining rhetorical bitchslaps you've rained down upon people in your Angry White Guise, I present you with a Japanese game about bitchslapping:
http://nigoro.jp/game/rosecamellia/rosecamellia.php
Enjoy!
In honor of the many entertaining rhetorical bitchslaps you've rained down upon people in your Angry White Guise, I present you with a Japanese game about bitchslapping:
http://nigoro.jp/game/rosecamellia/rosecamellia.php
Enjoy!
From Pat Dwyer
But Let Me Tell You Why I Hate Don Hall As Much As I Do
Don Hall, what a fucking waist of space. I don't believe that there are words enough in the English language to truly encapsulate how much of a raging tool box Don Hall really is. So I will choose the word "kitten". To some this word brings to mind soft, delicate, and comforting reminders of their youth. For others "Kitten" reminds them of a tender relationship of abounding love. To me, the word "kitten", makes me want to cut off my own junk, feed it to myself and cry as I slowly bleed to death. FUCK YOU DON HALL! YOU FUCKING KITTEN! If one takes into account that I am allergic to cats, have been bitten or clawed by every single one I've ever touched and would choose to raise a cat in sublime loving happiness for the soul purpose watch it's eyes explode as it circles in the microwave, you may begin to understand how much I hate Don Hall; and even that couldn't even possibly do it. Don is the ice patch that a decrepit own lady blames for her now lame legs. Don is a tornado sucking up and throwing the 4 year old daughter of the man that watches. Don is the hook that the newly gutted calf hangs from as it circles the slaughter house floor. Don is a Popsicle that gives you such bad brain freeze that you snot. Don is Aids. Don Hall, do the world a favor and get hit by the Wiener-mobile. "I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wein....FUCK YOU DON HALL. Go to hell and die. Slowly. Painfully! Slowly and Painfully. Happy Birthday? More like...Shmappy...Tirth....ah FUCK YOU DON HALL!
-Pat "Your Worstest Enemy Ever" Dwyer
p.s. Jen is cool.
Don Hall, what a fucking waist of space. I don't believe that there are words enough in the English language to truly encapsulate how much of a raging tool box Don Hall really is. So I will choose the word "kitten". To some this word brings to mind soft, delicate, and comforting reminders of their youth. For others "Kitten" reminds them of a tender relationship of abounding love. To me, the word "kitten", makes me want to cut off my own junk, feed it to myself and cry as I slowly bleed to death. FUCK YOU DON HALL! YOU FUCKING KITTEN! If one takes into account that I am allergic to cats, have been bitten or clawed by every single one I've ever touched and would choose to raise a cat in sublime loving happiness for the soul purpose watch it's eyes explode as it circles in the microwave, you may begin to understand how much I hate Don Hall; and even that couldn't even possibly do it. Don is the ice patch that a decrepit own lady blames for her now lame legs. Don is a tornado sucking up and throwing the 4 year old daughter of the man that watches. Don is the hook that the newly gutted calf hangs from as it circles the slaughter house floor. Don is a Popsicle that gives you such bad brain freeze that you snot. Don is Aids. Don Hall, do the world a favor and get hit by the Wiener-mobile. "I wish I were an Oscar Meyer wein....FUCK YOU DON HALL. Go to hell and die. Slowly. Painfully! Slowly and Painfully. Happy Birthday? More like...Shmappy...Tirth....ah FUCK YOU DON HALL!
-Pat "Your Worstest Enemy Ever" Dwyer
p.s. Jen is cool.
Saturday, February 2, 2008
From Rebar
The litany of things Don Hall has done or uttered to proclaim himself a
horse's ass is as epic as anything Virgil, Milton or Dante could come up
with. When the drunken sprite who lives in Don Hall's weenus takes over
his faculties and makes him expose his ballsack for the 4,791st time, or
stick objects in his pants (or on said ballsack), or express himself
through dance (both interpretive and freestyle) - all one can do is steel
oneself..and try to avert your eyes before the image is burned into your
brain.
Save yourself. It's much too late for me.
horse's ass is as epic as anything Virgil, Milton or Dante could come up
with. When the drunken sprite who lives in Don Hall's weenus takes over
his faculties and makes him expose his ballsack for the 4,791st time, or
stick objects in his pants (or on said ballsack), or express himself
through dance (both interpretive and freestyle) - all one can do is steel
oneself..and try to avert your eyes before the image is burned into your
brain.
Save yourself. It's much too late for me.
From Regan Davis and Lisa F.
Don's Double Dactyl
Fuckety Shmuckety
Coupe de Ville Hall is a
Horse's Ass everyday
spoken or writ.
Blogging his ego is
E-scatalogical
Just like canned feces we
don't give a shit.
Fuckety Shmuckety
Coupe de Ville Hall is a
Horse's Ass everyday
spoken or writ.
Blogging his ego is
E-scatalogical
Just like canned feces we
don't give a shit.
From Seth Fisher
Don, you are the only guy in the world that I can take seriously on the topics of politics and social issues after you've just giggled and showed me your balls. (An incredibly shrewd debate tactic now that I think about it.) I actually look up to you for crying over cartoons because you're one of the few people I've met that truly leads his life with his heart. From our first late-night flyposting trips I learned early on that you don't do theatre for fame and recognition (though you don't turn them down), you do what you do as a death defying challenge to everything that is cold, corrupt, and apathetic. You have a child's optimism and a man's courage and you will always be a reminder to me that there are real-life George Baileys out there who are wealthy beyond anything money can measure.
And you're the only guy I know that can pull off the naked-except-for-stage-blood-and-a-devil-mask look. Lookin' good, D-ray. Lookin' good...
(Are there any pictures from that shoot for Phobia with the devil mask? Aside from the one burned onto Gemma's poor brain? I think that's what made her move to England.)
And you're the only guy I know that can pull off the naked-except-for-stage-blood-and-a-devil-mask look. Lookin' good, D-ray. Lookin' good...
(Are there any pictures from that shoot for Phobia with the devil mask? Aside from the one burned onto Gemma's poor brain? I think that's what made her move to England.)
From Cholley Kuhaneck
Things you should know about Don Hall
1) Don Hall has hacked into the IRS mainframe so many times that they just gave up and assigned him a user name and password.
2) Don Hall can sing the national anthem. In every language
3) Don Hall can write blog entries so scathing he gets hate e-mails from the Bhudda.
4) Don Hall can dissassemble and reassemble any small appliance. With his mind.
5) Don Hall can run so fast that he regularly practices softball by pitching to himself.
6) Don Hall can give notes that last longer than the show he is giving notes about.
7) Don Hall once barbacued for 10 years solid.
8) Don Hall can out-wrestle a bear, if you could find a bear that hasn't been warned about him by other bears.
9) Don Hall won The Sears Tower in a poker game.
10) Don Hall is one of the best freinds I have.
1) Don Hall has hacked into the IRS mainframe so many times that they just gave up and assigned him a user name and password.
2) Don Hall can sing the national anthem. In every language
3) Don Hall can write blog entries so scathing he gets hate e-mails from the Bhudda.
4) Don Hall can dissassemble and reassemble any small appliance. With his mind.
5) Don Hall can run so fast that he regularly practices softball by pitching to himself.
6) Don Hall can give notes that last longer than the show he is giving notes about.
7) Don Hall once barbacued for 10 years solid.
8) Don Hall can out-wrestle a bear, if you could find a bear that hasn't been warned about him by other bears.
9) Don Hall won The Sears Tower in a poker game.
10) Don Hall is one of the best freinds I have.
From Sharko Bizarre
What can I say about Don that hasn't been already said? What story can I share that he hasn't already shared? What insult can I hurl that hasn't already been hurled at him time and time again?
A man who'll do what he can to get "asses in seats" (his words) for his shows.
A man who'll have a drink with a friend because he loves being with that friend.
A man who'll alter his body hair for a role (check out those side burns!).
A man who cannot exist without his morning coffee.
A man who'll take off his clothes at the drop of a hat (incidentally, after Don showed up naked at our hotel door, Andy Cobb stripped down and the 2 of them had a footrace
through the hotel hallways---Andy won)!
But, to truly experience Don, you have to spend time with the man. A picture doesn't do him justice.
As I said before, I could throw out insults, as friends often do to one another. I've known him for 14 years, so that would be easy. But I'll leave these thoughts instead.
Don is probably my biggest fan (next to my wife) when it comes to my music. He's always believed in my abilities as a composer and has always championed what I wrote. That's a rare thing to find in the entertainment field, let alone a good friend. To him, I'll always be grateful for not only giving me the chance to compose for WNEP, but believing in me.
One more thing: Don allowed me to come up with a truly memorable marriage proposal when he suggested we write Michelle into the ARH NYE script and I propose to her right before midnight.
Thanks again, buddy.
The pictures that I've attached illustrate who Don is:
A man who'll do what he can to get "asses in seats" (his words) for his shows.
A man who'll have a drink with a friend because he loves being with that friend.
A man who'll alter his body hair for a role (check out those side burns!).
A man who cannot exist without his morning coffee.
A man who'll take off his clothes at the drop of a hat (incidentally, after Don showed up naked at our hotel door, Andy Cobb stripped down and the 2 of them had a footrace
through the hotel hallways---Andy won)!
As I said before, I could throw out insults, as friends often do to one another. I've known him for 14 years, so that would be easy. But I'll leave these thoughts instead.
Don is probably my biggest fan (next to my wife) when it comes to my music. He's always believed in my abilities as a composer and has always championed what I wrote. That's a rare thing to find in the entertainment field, let alone a good friend. To him, I'll always be grateful for not only giving me the chance to compose for WNEP, but believing in me.
One more thing: Don allowed me to come up with a truly memorable marriage proposal when he suggested we write Michelle into the ARH NYE script and I propose to her right before midnight.
Thanks again, buddy.
From Lisa Fairman
Don Hall is the only person on the planet who has pooped his pants 13 times and still has the respect of all his friends.
Happy Birthday, Don. You know how I feel.
Happy Birthday, Don. You know how I feel.
From Erica Reid Gerdes
From warming up in your living room before I even lived in Chicago, to
rehearsing a few weeks for a show you weren't in, to zombies, to DADA, and
everything in between, thanks for being such a great friend.
And with respect to Mondo Yippeeeeeee, I'd say you are the asshole who is sometimes
a delicate flower.
Happy Birthday!
rehearsing a few weeks for a show you weren't in, to zombies, to DADA, and
everything in between, thanks for being such a great friend.
And with respect to Mondo Yippeeeeeee, I'd say you are the asshole who is sometimes
a delicate flower.
Happy Birthday!
From Michael Brownlee
Behold, the Power of Don
A very Happy Birthday to the only man who has ever coaxed me out of my pants.
I'm not ashamed to say it: I love Don Hall.
Here's to many, many more hilariously awkward situations.
Friday, February 1, 2008
From Kate Hendrickson & Jason Meyer
Happy birthday to the man who sometimes provided a canvas, and sometimes *was* the canvas.
Still makes us laugh just thinking about tit. Uh, "it."
Love, JK+L
Still makes us laugh just thinking about tit. Uh, "it."
Love, JK+L
From Ron K.
I Heart Don Hall.
Through all my years with WNEP, Don was the only person who unquestioningly and wholeheartedly supported me in my neverending and undying love for Uber Right-Wing Harpy, Ann Coulter (whom I also Heart...obviously).
Through all my years with WNEP, Don was the only person who unquestioningly and wholeheartedly supported me in my neverending and undying love for Uber Right-Wing Harpy, Ann Coulter (whom I also Heart...obviously).
Happy B-Day to the worlds oldest living curmudgeon.
From Jenny Brennan
Despite an outward demeanor that is brash, loud, righteous and
opinionated, deep down, Don Hall is an endearing bucket of sensitivity.
And that’s what makes him such a lovely person.
Happy birthday.
opinionated, deep down, Don Hall is an endearing bucket of sensitivity.
And that’s what makes him such a lovely person.
Happy birthday.
From Mary Jo Bolduc
Don Hall is crazy. Ok, crazy in a good kinda way! Thanks for sayin it like it is, my friend. And...if you would ever like to do a Journey duet on a red line train...look no further, cuz I'm your gal! Don't stop believin... Ohohohooooohhhhhhhhhhh!!!
Happy Birthday~
Happy Birthday~
Thursday, January 31, 2008
From Clay Sander
Don and I have a history that is filled with incredibly great moments and shitty shit moments. A biography of my life (a surefire best-seller....) cannot be told without Don Hall taking up several chapters.
To him, I pay my highest compliment - He's always interesting. Piss me off? Sure. Confuse me? Most definitely. But, bore me? Fuck NO. And, he can make me laugh...hard.
I look back on my days at with Don at WNEP with a great fondness.
My favorite memory was performing Armageddon Radio Hour around Christmas-time at the Halsted space. The smell of Lysol-mixed-with-paint-and-cigarette-soot wafted in from the behind the smoke-obscured lights as my wife sang "Let it Snow" to an appreciative audience.
I remember, vividly, standing on stage and glancing at Don in his Charles-chair, smoking a cigar, listening to the song with a big grin. I realized Don was absolutely NOT in character. He looked almost serene. I realized the moment was special and, as I try to do often, started to take a mental picture just so I would always remember.....
It was at that very point that Don sensed my gaze, nodded towards me, smiled and winked - relaying without words, that everything, right then, was just so. fucking. beautiful..... I'll always appreciate that about Don - the absolute fantastic quality that allows him to make me feel completely warm and joyful.
That was before the drama of the space closing, the incredibly cold winter, the subsequent shitty-shit that we both went through that damaged our close relationship for some time. The sad confrontations that emerged were a result of me being less of a friend and more of trying to be right. I'll take this opportunity to offer a long-overdue apology for my actions then, Don. As our birthday's grow further away from thirty, it's time to say that I really feel like you're the older brother I never had. I truly love you for it.
It's just too bad you're such a bleeding-heart liberal jackass.
Happy Birthday and thanks for everything.
To him, I pay my highest compliment - He's always interesting. Piss me off? Sure. Confuse me? Most definitely. But, bore me? Fuck NO. And, he can make me laugh...hard.
I look back on my days at with Don at WNEP with a great fondness.
My favorite memory was performing Armageddon Radio Hour around Christmas-time at the Halsted space. The smell of Lysol-mixed-with-paint-and-cigarette-soot wafted in from the behind the smoke-obscured lights as my wife sang "Let it Snow" to an appreciative audience.
I remember, vividly, standing on stage and glancing at Don in his Charles-chair, smoking a cigar, listening to the song with a big grin. I realized Don was absolutely NOT in character. He looked almost serene. I realized the moment was special and, as I try to do often, started to take a mental picture just so I would always remember.....
It was at that very point that Don sensed my gaze, nodded towards me, smiled and winked - relaying without words, that everything, right then, was just so. fucking. beautiful..... I'll always appreciate that about Don - the absolute fantastic quality that allows him to make me feel completely warm and joyful.
That was before the drama of the space closing, the incredibly cold winter, the subsequent shitty-shit that we both went through that damaged our close relationship for some time. The sad confrontations that emerged were a result of me being less of a friend and more of trying to be right. I'll take this opportunity to offer a long-overdue apology for my actions then, Don. As our birthday's grow further away from thirty, it's time to say that I really feel like you're the older brother I never had. I truly love you for it.
It's just too bad you're such a bleeding-heart liberal jackass.
Happy Birthday and thanks for everything.
From Scott Walters @ Theatre Ideas
I am so happy that Don has a blog, because that way I'm not the only abrasive, opinionated jerk in the theatrosphere. Happy birthday!
From The Devilvet
Don Hall and I were both spawned from the same big black vagina last fall at Didier Farms. Like Romulus and Remus, we then crawled our way over like pink marsupial embryos to our mother's sack of pumpkin apple slushee cider. I will always think of that day as his true birthday. Still, I wish him all the best on this his more "conventional" birthday
From Dave Goss, Managing Director of WNEP
I can sum up Don Hall in two words:
"THE CLAPPER"
If you've never experienced "the Clapper," consider yourself lucky. If you have. . . well. . . I'm sure you'll agree that it defies description. Much like the man himself.
And you'll also agree that your life has not been the same since.
Happy birthday, brother.
From Paul Imboden
NYC FRINGE FEST BRUSH w/ FAME (Blackout)
DON HALL, overzealous promoter
SAM ROCKWELL, star of stage and screen
In line at a coffee kiosk on a NYC street corner. A few seconds of
awkward silence, and suddenly... realization.
DON
Hey! You're Sam Rockwell!
SAM
Uhmm... yes. I am.
DON
Cool!
(Beat.)
DON
Hey, we're putting up a dada show!
(DON hands SAM a flyer. SAM looks around for the "Punk'd!" camera crew as
DON continues sales pitch. Quick fade to black.)
-Fin-
DON HALL, overzealous promoter
SAM ROCKWELL, star of stage and screen
In line at a coffee kiosk on a NYC street corner. A few seconds of
awkward silence, and suddenly... realization.
DON
Hey! You're Sam Rockwell!
SAM
Uhmm... yes. I am.
DON
Cool!
(Beat.)
DON
Hey, we're putting up a dada show!
(DON hands SAM a flyer. SAM looks around for the "Punk'd!" camera crew as
DON continues sales pitch. Quick fade to black.)
-Fin-
Wednesday, January 30, 2008
From Jessica Schlobohm
Don Hall is not a person who feels the need to hold his tongue. What he thinks, he tells you, and if he says something, you know he means it as much as a person can mean something they say. In that same regard, he will not mince words, nor will he unneccessarily compliment someone if he doesn't believe it fully. Bearing all that in mind, I remember quite well the day that I received one of the greatest compliments of my performance career.We had just finished a set in rehearsal and were going to take a 10 minute break. Don and I were both heading down the hallway of Gill Park, he to smoke and me to the bathroom. And before our paths split, he said to me, "Hey Schlobohm." I turned. "You're fun to watch." And with that, he headed out for a cigarette.
A seemingly innocuous comment, maybe. But from the man that doesn't use words unnecessarily, I was given the greatest compliment, because rarely have I ever sensed that someone meant what they said as much as Don did, and does in most everything.
Thank you, Don, for your honesty in all things. The same thing that may piss people off is the thing that also shows them how much you care when you care, and how much you believe what you believe. People can say whatever the hell they want in life, but when you say it, it is worth its weight in gold (or shit, depending on who you ask). *Grin*
Thanks for being you. Honest, blunt, beautiful you.
Happy Birthday, big guy.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
From Dan Izzo
Don Hall? Don Hall! Don Hall is the kind of guy who says "Hey we should get a hooker, f*** her then chop her up and bury her in the forest preserve." But at the end of the night, you're the one with a freaking shovel in your hand, while he's off on a g-d smoke break. Son of a bitch!!
From David Fink @ The Acorn Theatre
Many of you think Don creates art out of respect to the audience. OK, well maybe none of you think that. Anyway, the last time Don appeared at the Acorn Theater, he told me that his goal on stage was to make me laugh. Some wish to enlighten or impress an appreciative audience...not Don. He just wants to make me laugh. Not an easy task as I often say something is funny but rarely actually laugh at it. Well, watching Don portray a very virginal girl on stage was one of the funniest things I can remember. I think everyone reading this should ask Don to create a young virgin for their amusement. It is better if there is a horny guy hitting on him. Trust me on this one.
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